An Unfortunate Hunt - Hog Wild in Texas

This story is reposted from www.backwoodsbound.com with permission from the author and editor Mr. James Burns. This hunt occurred back in 2007, but the concerns are legitimate and prevalent to hunters now. I mentioned this story in the forums. Here it is for those who don't look at the forums. This is a true story and while humorous, it wasn't at the time!!


"If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." I could end this story here and now but then you wouldn't know what I didn't want to talk about plus the editors would have a big space to fill in this issue. So I'll tell this tale as nicely as I can. I won't tell you the name of the place I was hunting or the names of those who run and operate this joint, but if you follow the clues I hope you can figure out who it is when you come across this outfit on the web. So, here we go.

It started last fall when my nephew Tim, (I'm using his real name here. After all, it is his fault I got sucked into this whole thing) asked who wanted to go to south Texas in February to hunt wild hogs. Myself and Kenny, (also a real name) jumped at the chance. After all we'd never done anything like that before and it would be a nice diversion in the middle of winter. Tim also suckered his buddies Jeff and Andy (real names, show no mercy!) into going. Poor saps!

We all got excited after looking at their web site. "Big mean wild Texas hogs", bobcats, coyotes and various varmints were suppose to rule the night. After reading "the record this year for lost nerve at night is but a short 20 minutes!", we were really pumped and started counting the days until we left. Little did we realize that it was all just good salesmanship and the deception (I don't want to sound to harsh by calling them lies) had started.

While waiting to check-in we became acquainted with two fellow hunters from Utah, Jim and Christian. They had flown in to San Antonio, rented a car and drove to the ranch. After checking in and paying our lodging, meals and guide fees, we went through an orientation. Rules concerning gun safety, what to do if you killed a hog, meal times, etc. were covered. This was a good idea and things were running smoothly. It wasn't until we started asking some questions that things started to take a turn.

We found out we were hunting a "ranch" 300 acres in size surrounded by an 8 foot high fence. Didn't seem "wild" to us. When asked about hunting bobcats we were told you may luck out and see one, but there hadn't been any spotted since last summer sometime. "What about coyotes and mountain lions?" Same answer. We figured these were on another of their "multiple ranches located within 120 miles of San Antonio, Texas". Well we'd just have to concentrate on those "big mean wild Texas hogs". Yeah right!

After the "orientation" we were split into groups and dropped at different corners of the "ranch" and told to spot and stalk hunt in a clockwise motion around the property. Hunting in this way, we were spread out and covered more ground. Kenny, Jeff and I teamed up and started our "hunt". After walking through the brush and grass for about half an hour, I heard some noise in a thicket and out ran a hog. It was moving to fast to get a shot plus there was too much brush in the way. It ran off to my right here Kenny spotted it a minute or two later. Jeff, in the middle, was lagging behind and never saw it. Poor bastard.

When everyone regrouped back at "camp", it turned out the hog we saw was the only one spotted. Uh oh! What happened to the packs of 10 - 20 hogs running together? I mean, with seven guys in the field, hunting 300 acres of fenced property, there should have been more than one hog seen. Whether they were hiding or running, someone should have caught up to them somewhere. We weren't discouraged yet. After all, nighttime was suppose to be when the big ones came out to prowl.

After supper we once again split into groups and headed for one of many blinds located around the "ranch" shortly before 8:00pm. Our "guide" had spread some corn around the blinds we were going to hunt from to bring in the hogs. This seemed like a great situation since each of us had brought along "2 bags" (100 lb's) of corn apiece as requested. There should have been piles of corn for the hogs to feed on but we saw the "guide" leave with only 2 bags on his 4-wheeler. What was going to happen to the rest?

I forgot to mention there were elk, buffalo, Sika, Fallow and Axis deer living on the property as well as some exotic sheep, longhorn cattle and Blackbuck antelope. How did all this "wildlife" survive? They survived on all the corn the customers brought with them to bait hogs with. Nice scam. Let me also mention that you could walk up to most of these animals without them spooking and running away. Sounded more and more like "a shoot, not a hunt". Okay back to the "hunt".

Kenny, Jeff and I lasted until eleven when we decided to give up. There were deer, possums and raccoons feeding on our corn below our stand, but no hogs. We did hear a few hogs out from us. We figured out the next day that they had been on the other side of the fence about 30 yards from our blind.

Tim and Andy never saw any hogs either and they stayed out until 3:30am! They did manage to kill a couple of possums and a rabbit that night. The mighty hunters!

The next morning we were quizzed by our hosts on the night's hunt. I really didn't see any expressions of disbelief on their faces as we related our tales of woe. It didn't matter, they had a great plan in store for us later that morning that would surely produce results and we were all up to the challenge although the wall of doubt was starting to build.

After a breakfast, we all gathered around to hear the morning's strategy. Everyone was going to the front of the "ranch", spread out about 100 yards apart and drive everything to the rear. Sounded like a good plan and it would have been if there had been any hogs! We managed to run the deer, elk and rams ahead of us until they just stopped and let us walk by.

When we got to the far fence we had to search around for each other. See, no one had any idea what to do once we got to the end so we milled around until we finally found each other. After about 45 minutes we had all found each other and started to share stories. Seems once again only one hog was seen and it had been in the same area I had spotted the one the previous day.

There was diffidently something going on here. That nagging feeling of being had started to surface. The idea that you were baited in to hunt "big mean wild Texas hogs" and then giving up on that you pay them more money to shoot one of their more expensive animals. Their plan was starting to work.

After lunch, which was ham sandwiches and chips, the wheeling and dealing started. Andy and Jeff finally worked a deal with the owner, which we never saw the whole trip, that a person could shoot a ram for an extra $150.00. This was on top of the $300.00 each of us had already paid for 2 hogs. Sounded like a scam to me since the price of a ram was only $299.00. This guy was really making out. He finally settled on a deal of 4 hog tags for a ram. That meant $600.00 for a $299.00 ram. Still a great deal for him especially since the hogs were suppose to be wild and not costing him a thing!

Oh yeah. During lunch, three more suckers I mean hunters showed up to chase the "big mean wild Texas hogs". None of them looked too enthused while we told them we had not killed any hogs and that only one (we'll pretty sure it was the same hog) had been spotted. The bad news traveled fast and our hosts were probably wishing we were checking out the day.

Anyway, while Andy and Jeff were trying to work out a deal for us, Tim, Kenny and I decided to go for a walk. No need in calling it a hunt. We spread out and started across one corner of the property. We really didn't think we would see anything but it was better than sitting back at camp sulking and feeling like a sucker. Once getting to the fence we just followed it at a leisurely pace around the ranch back to camp.

On our way back in we heard a shot. We immediately knew someone had taken something other than a hog. A deal had been struck. Jeff had taken a nice ram. When upon hearing the deal and seeing Jeff's ram back at camp, Tim decided he would go get one too. He came back in with a nice trophy. We teased him about walking up to it with a hand full of corn and shooting it between the eyes with his pistol.

Andy had made a deal on taking a buffalo the next morning. The wheels started spinning. I offered my tags to Kenny so he could take a ram and he offered his to me so I could take one. But by that time we had drank a couple of beers and didn't feel like beating the brush again. We decided to see what happened that night and then maybe go after one the next morning.

By the time supper was over, which by the way was the best meal yet, bbq'd chicken and fixings, it had gotten dark and plans for the evening were being made. Tim and Jeff decided to head to town for more ice for their meat and trophies. Things were about to get interesting.

Our host had disappeared for awhile. We thought he was out spreading corn for the new guys. When he showed up a short time later he started enquiring who was going out that night. There weren't many takers and he kept saying you should go out. I wasn't paying much attention until he came to Kenny and I and asked who that was that left out in the truck earlier. We told him where the guys had gone. He asked if we were going out and we told him no. He then said "things can change in a hurry". When we asked what that meant, he just told us to ask our buddies when they got back. What did he mean by that?

While Kenny went to get his cell phone to call the guys and get the scoop, the others had pinned down our "guide" to see what was going on. He cracked under the interrogation. A trailer load of hogs and just been unloaded at the front gate. The jig was up! No need in making the call.

Later while talking amongst ourselves we felt that if Tim and Jeff hadn't have went to town for ice and caught them red handed nothing would have been said. They were going to let us think that we were a bunch of idiots and that ten guys out "hunting" 300 acres of fenced property weren't able to spot any hogs. I guess they thought we would assume they had suddenly decided to come through the 4 or 5 traps they had rigged in the fence. Now I really felt like a sap!

When the guys made it back from their ice run they confirmed the unloading. Probably 20 - 30 hogs of different sizes had been let loose. This got everyone excited. They were going to get a hog one way or another and not go home empty handed.

By this time Kenny and I had all but given up. This wasn't hunting to us. If these guys wanted to go shoot a penned up hog, they could go right ahead. This wasn't we thought we were getting into and in some way didn't want to give our hosts the satisfaction of seeing us jump at the chance to chase the new arrivals. I made a deal with Andy that if wanted to fill one of my tags he could if I got some of his buffalo meat the next day. He accepted and came back later with nice hundred pounder.

One of the new arrivals, Justin had decided to take a fallow deer. Since he had freezer full of deer at home, he just wanted the trophy. I quickly informed him that I would gladly take the meat and he could have the backstraps from it. He accepted and off he went to return later with a nice buck.

The next morning, Andy was true to his word and took a nice little bull. He gave me one of the shoulders from it. So now I had a hog, meat from a $1500.00 deer and some meat from a $800.00 buffalo and hadn't fired a shot. Not too bad. I wasn't going home empty handed.

We were packed up and checked out by 11:00 that morning. I had the feeling our hosts were glad to see us go before the new batch of "hunters" arrived that afternoon. I'm sure they didn't want us telling all we knew to the fifteen guys coming in but I'm sure Justin filled them in since he paid for extra days and was staying the weekend.

Our usual saying, "it's nice just to get out", just didn't seem to apply to this "hunt". I left with the deep feeling of being taken advantage of and being made to look like a fool. These folks watched us "stalking" through the brush like we were really doing something. We joked that they had a pool to see who would stay out in the blinds the longest at night or to see who would go on the most "spot and stalk" hunts. I can say for certain that our "guide" didn't earn his $75.00 fee and I sure didn't eat $75.00 worth of food in two days. I mean how much can some chicken and rice, boxes of cereal, rolls and muffins cost? Also sleeping on one of three bunk beds crammed into a room and then walking behind the "bunkhouse" to shower and go to the bathroom wasn't worth $75.00 either.

In conclusion. I can add this to my series of unfortunate hunts but not because of something I did wrong like a missed shot or falling asleep in the blind but because it was a setup from the get go. We did have some laughs like the night we were hunting from the blind and thought there was a hog nearby. Jeff got his gun ready while I stuck the spotlight out the window. He said he was ready and I turned on the light only to shine it in our eyes because I had it backwards. Classic stuff. I hope you, the reader, were able to pick up the clues in this story and apply them when researching a place to hog hunt in Texas.

Original link -- http://www.backwoodsbound.com/zznewv07i03.html